Wise Words

I forget where I read this but it has stayed with me.

"Too often, we live our lives to meet everyone else’s expectations. If you design the life you want based on your values and priorities, you’ll be much happier.


Think of your life like a string of pearls. Every day, you want to find at least one pearl. It could be a fleeting moment—a joke share with your child, a compliment from a co-worker or hearing your favorite song on the radio. If you look out for positive moments and positive attributes in people, you will almost certainly find them and you will feel happier as a result."

Wanderlust and Motherhood

I worte this in the final months of my first pregnancy....

Nov 2009
Last year this time we were in Ushuaia as part of our two-week sojourn to southern Patagonia. Today I complete 30 weeks of my pregnancy. My baby is 10 weeks away and I have months of late nights, breastfeeding, poop patrol, diaper changes, loud cries, yawns and sweet smiles to live through but I’m already thinking in terms where I can go on vacation with my baby. I’ve already ruled out a few on my list of places to see. Cambodia (Angkor Wat specifically), South Africa, and Morocco can wait. It doesn’t help that I subscribe to Travel and Leisure, or have a new liking for travel writing or that Chan Brothers advertises in Today every single day or that to top it all Silk Air has set up a reservations office in the lobby of my office building.

How will motherhood affect my wanderlust?

My aunt left my infant cousin with her parents and traveled to SE Asia and Africa. Not a bad model to follow but I want my baby to be part of my adventures. Maybe I’ll take the adventure down a notch and travel to safe places that are a reasonable flight away with English-speaking populations, vegetarian food, hotels with kitchenettes and access to healthcare facilities. I realize that just these requirements cut down my list of places to see my more than 75%! I have great hopes for Australia which looks like a good place to take an infant and my parents who might be a great addition to baby’s first vacation. If that seems like a little too ambitious how about a baby step called Nikoi Island or Bintan? Of course there would be the obligatory trip back home to India. Maybe I could sneak in a trip to Goa, it has been so long! Even Lonavala would make me happy. The UK and Europe also seem like good candidates. It would be great to travel to the Netherlands and visit my dear friend Elsiena or explore the English countryside by road.

I also secretly harbour a wish to experience a Club Med holiday at least once in my life. Maybe I’ll save that for later when I have a rambunctious 6 or 7 year old.

I recently read an article about a young mother taking her infant on a family vacation to Ireland. It was fairly reassuring to know that with adequate preparation and reasonable expectations, it can be done.

How much fun it will be exploring new sites and sounds together even if she won’t remember anything, I will remember each and every moment and cherish it forever.

So here is a prayer for my little one – I hope you enjoy travel and exploring as much as your daddy and mommy do; I hope you travel to places far and wide, places fascinating and beautiful, places that fill you with wonder and joy, and places that inspire prayer and gratitude; and I hope wherever you go you carry our love with you and that you always return home.

Singapore...An Update

My last post was in September 2008. That was almost 4 years ago. A lot has happened since 2008. For one, I now have two small children. For another, we have moved twice in three years and now own the apartment where we live. A lot has stayed the same. I still work for the same company, for the same client. I still like to cook, travel and read.

I have now lived in Singapore for as long as I lived in NYC. And this is home now; though a day doesn't go by without remembering, reminiscing and recollecting. I don't want to sound ungrateful. We have a full life here - with kids, friends, jobs, and each other. But it is not NYC.

Well, What A Weekend!

I used to be the avid Formula One fan once upon a time in Bombay. Then I moved to the U.S. where the idea of waking up before 9am on a Sunday morning pretty much killed the F1 spirit. I didn’t really miss it. Baseball kept me occupied from April to October and football from September to January. (No wonder February and March were always my least-favourite months, no sports!)
Anyway, this year Singapore debuted on the F1 scene. And how! A road race. A night race. Three collisions. A stalled car. An undetached fuel hose. Pit lane penalties. Bumps. Sparks. A winner who started 15th on the grid! Oh, what a race! And I almost didn’t make it. Yeah, I was incredibly blasé about the race. Didn’t even bother buying tickets. Then good ol’ Murzy showed up with two extra tickets and the party was on. F1 is so much more than a car race. It is a licence to party unabashedly. I can’t remember the last time I stayed up till 5.30am. I can’t remember the last time I came home from a night out and made eggs. It was like Sg had decided to do away with its sterile image for a whole weekend. When we left Clarke Quay at 5am Sunday morning, every eatery on the way home was OPEN and PACKED!
Sg put up a great show. In its own characteristic way it made F1 Uniquely Singapore. Will definitely be back next year.

Almost Nine Months!

It takes 40 weeks for a human to create another of its own species. So in the time it takes to create life, what have I done in Sg?
Well, first and foremost I have made it home. Yes, ladies and gentleman, Singapore is HOME. I like the way my apartment is shaping up and I’m looking forward to my first Diwali here.
Second I have tossed away my immigrant mentality and boldly accepted an expat mentality; just in time for global financial crises which should be reason enough to cut spending and adopt the frugal life of a new immigrant.
Third, I have worked harder than I ever have. At some point in the future I will look at this period of adjustment and be proud of myself.
Fourth, I have travelled to Vietnam and Indonesia. Not as much as I expected but something is better than nothing. In the same time, M has amassed about 200,000 Krisflyer points.
Fifth, I have become a better and more efficient cook. And it’s my number one stress-buster. How? Think chopping vegetables.
Sixth, I have learnt not to drown my plants. Hopefully the three new ones will survive longer than my poor basil plant.
Well, there have been other minor accomplishments but so much more to do (like buy our first house or have a baby!). As the year runs away from us again, I contemplate what the new year will bring (a return to the immigrant mentality for sure!). Top of my list – eat healthier and maintain an exercise regime. I still don’t know how veggie curry and rice will fit into that but constantly being frustrated at not finding clothes that fit well is a motivator as strong as any.

Six Months

It’s been a while since my last report from this new place called Singapore that is quickly beginning to feel like home. I have days when I feel uprooted and lost and I’m best avoided on those days. But mostly I feel good. Life is finally beginning to make sense again. My job is beginning to make sense. The roads, the food, the accent, the clothing sizes, the lingo (ok lor may sound like ok lah but there is a world of difference in the meaning), the odd stuff (they blow dry your hair before they cut it) – it’s all beginning to make sense. Phew!

I’m continually amazed at the human capacity to retain memories selectively. When I reflect at the time past I mostly have good memories. Of course, over-writing the memories of the recent past may take some time but I’m sure somewhere in the recesses of my mind the process has already begun.

I’m also amazed at the human capacity to adapt and adopt. Yes, I came to Sg kicking and screaming but once here I have quickly adjusted to my new environment. And now a feeling of always having been here creeping in. And that feels good.

Four Months

It has been four months since I moved to Sg. Four months since I started work. And it has been one roller-coaster ride. Everyone wants to know how I like it here, how I'm adjusting, etc. etc. And I've been maintaining a 'so-far-so-good' attitude.
But last night when I was coming home from a long day at work it hit me. Of all the places in Asia we could have moved to I'm glad/fortunate we moved to Sg. The city is a perfect counterpoint to our absolutely-out-of-control life. There is no chaos. There is a structure for everything. There is guidance provided for every step you take. There is a plan to tackle any and all issues. Everything is well-organized and fairly predictable.
The Bbayite and New Yorker in me may rebel and revolt at this statement but I'm beginning to REALLY like this place.